$#*_^(*@%!!!

The Midwest is being hit by a major blizzad. It's been snowing since this morning and hasn't stopped. My husband had to go into work (problem there) so I decided to walk around the corner to the store and get a pepsi. The first time I stepped out and was hit with snow in the face I turned around and went back in. A coat and tennis shoes wasn't gonna cut it. I got on my boots, scarf, hat, gloves and pulled up my hood. As I stomped through the deep snow up the street with little visibility I felt like a chimp. You can't walk normal in this stuff. You always look like a silver back on a mission for berries

I'm guessing everything will be shut down tomorrow and if it's not this pigmy ain't going anywhere. By the time I got to the party store I regretted my decision to even go out. I was tired, freezing, had slipped on ice I don't know how many times and my back was hurting from being hunched over like a cave man. Well on the way back I slipped on someone's unshoveled and unsalted sidewalk, fell and for whatever reason threw my pop over my head and it landed in the snow on what's usually a lawn. That's a lawsuit people. I'm just saying. I won't make a stink this time cause it could be elderly people.

Anyway I got back up, went fishing for my pop in the snow, found it and made it home. Once I stripped off all the outer clothing I was still thinking about the fall and opened my pop. The thing exploded in my face from being shaken up. It went all over too, my face, my hair, shirt, floor, stove, refrigerator and even sprayed the cat. Every vile word in the English language popped in my head BUT I didn't say any of them. I slammed the almost empty bottle down on the counter, wiped off my face and started cleaning up the mess. What a wasted trip! Stay indoors Midwesterners! Especially if you're blonde. You could be killed